So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
