Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
