i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Randomize
