Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
