i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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