kristin has been a bad kristin
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
