There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
