marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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