I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
