I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
