I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize