Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Randomize
