This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
