Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
