No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize