Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
