I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
