At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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