dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
