OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
