i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
