Midget sex pt 2 tonight
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize
