I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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