I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
