hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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