I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
wow bdsm is so cute
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize