Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize