Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize