Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
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