You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I just got carded by a ten year old.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
