oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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