I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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