Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
