Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
She's the barista slut.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
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