was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
