I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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