I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize