I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Dicks are not precious.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
