used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
