At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Its about making memories worth repressing
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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