ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I smell like Dick and happiness
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