It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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