Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
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