hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
