well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
