i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i drank out of a bidet.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
