I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
