Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Randomize
