I got her a Nickelback box set.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
