make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
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